Chinese Dating Culture: All You Should Know About Dating In China
Dating Chinese women is easier now than before, but it’s still a complex process that requires knowledge and a plan. Here, we’ll provide you with the knowledge and help you make a plan to date a Chinese woman successfully.
5 interesting facts about dating in China
- The popularity of online dating apps increased drastically in 2020 when the lockdowns were imposed. For example, one of the most popular Chinese dating apps, Tantan, saw its revenue climb 29.3% YoY (year-on-year) in 2020 compared to 2019 (the same is about Tinder and other popular dating apps).
- Interestingly, it’s not only about dating and finding a match in China—they use dating apps for various purposes. According to a Chinese survey, 89% of respondents use dating sites to expand their social circles and find new friends!
- The dating apps in China change in order to meet these requirements (like Momo and Tantan, for example). These apps started matching users based on their interests and personalities rather than their physical appearance. Obviously, this means that Chinese people are now more interested in finding friends/partners for a serious relationship online than finding a one-night stand. The dating platforms are even used by protesters, so it looks like the range of possible uses of dating apps is just boundless in China.
- Around 33% of social/dating platform users in China were born after 1995. So young Chinese adults are the new target audience of the dating platforms, which helps us move to the next point…
- …It’s not only about the text. As younger generations of Chinese people enter the market and become active users of dating platforms, they start experimenting with video calls and live streams. They even have a video dating app available as a mini program in WeChat, the most popular app in China. The same can say about the apps for Chinese women interested in dating Western men: some provide such features as video chat and voice chat.
Where to meet Chinese people?
💬 💑 Online dating in China
So the very first option you should consider is Chinese dating sites. Online dating is extremely popular in this country, as you already know, and hundreds of millions of Chinese women are searching for a partner online right now.
However, this doesn’t mean you can just open WeChat and start dating Chinese girls. Chinese social networking and dating platforms were made for Chinese people who want to meet other Chinese people, so you will not find lots of women interested in meeting a foreigner there. What you need is Chinese dating sites for those interested in international dating. These platforms are not as popular as, say, WeChat or Tinder, but they are full of Chinese women who meet the main international dating requirements:
- They speak English
- They are genuinely interested in meeting a Western man
The problem with dating sites is that choosing the right one may be extremely time-consuming. However, if you don’t want to waste time, you can always rely on experts—like the ones who tested more than 30 dating apps, selected the best ones, and made this list for you.
🍸💑 Offline dating in China
If you’re interested in offline dating, here’s some good news for you: you don’t need to go to China. There are more than 5,000,000 Chinese in the United States! Most live in California and New York, so you can find a Chinese girl without going to a foreign country.
But well, we believe that’s different from what you’re looking for. So if you’re thinking about going to China, here’s a list of the places you need to visit:
- Chongqing. This city has the reputation of the place where the prettiest women in China live! Top places to meet girls: Xingguang Times Square, Fortune Mall.
- Beijing. You can’t ignore the capital of the country, right? Top places to meet girls: nightclubs such as Mix Club, V Plus Lounge, and Chocolate Nightclub.
- Shanghai. There are millions of ex-pats, students, and singles here, so the chances are quite high that you’ll find a match on the streets of this city. Top places to meet girls: The Bund (tourist destination), Dada Bar, Bar Rouge.
However, you should remember that Chinese culture is different from Western culture, which also applies to dating, so it’s worth learning more about this before going to China to find a couple.
Differences in customs and habits between Americans and Chinese
Let’s compare Chinese dating culture vs American one now. What are the main differences of a Chinese dating culture you need to be aware of before you even start dating a Chinese woman? Here’s the answer.
1. They are serious about dating
Casual dating is a thing in China, but it’s not as common as in the West, and it’s certainly not as popular when it comes to adults. Chinese people under 20 often date casually, but the ones in their 20s and 30s are more focused on building serious relationships. Sometimes, they even call each other “husband” and “wife” before they are actually married, which best illustrates how serious they are.
2. Naked marriages
No, this is not what you’re thinking. A “naked marriage” is a marriage between people who don’t own a car or a house yet—and the very existence of this concept shows that marriage is seen differently in Chinese culture. In the West, we don’t need to come up with a name for such marriages because they are the norm. In China, having a house and a car is so important for a groom that marrying a guy without these prerequisites is considered rebellious against social norms. The good news is that the number of “naked” marriages is increasing, which shows that men do not need to demonstrate their financial stability so badly, and women (or rather their families) are not as interested in it as before.
3. Dating is more difficult for men in China
There are 111 men aged 20-29 for 100 women of that age, and that’s a wide gap that surely influences the dating culture in the country. So it becomes more difficult for men to compete, and it’s obvious that Chinese women are picky and demanding because they have a lot of men to choose from.
4. Parental approval is important
Although it’s not as common today as a few decades ago, Chinese parents still control the marriage decisions of their children. Of course, this can also be applied to dating—as we’ve just said, Chinese tend to have serious relationships, so you need to prepare for parental involvement.
How to succeed in the Chinese dating scene as a newcomer?
Let’s talk about dating Chinese women now. The Western dating culture is different from the Chinese one, as you see—so building a romantic relationship with a Chinese girl may not be that easy. Here, you’ll find some tips to help you not screw up and better understand their dating etiquette.
- Learn Mandarin. Many young Chinese women speak English quite well, but there are only a few fluent speakers there. Learning the language of your girlfriend will help you understand her better, communicate with her parents, and show her that you respect her culture.
- Pay for the date. That’s what Chinese men do: they always pay for the meals, even if the date hasn’t been 100% successful. Chinese girls get used to it, and if you offer your partner to go Dutch on the first date, she’ll certainly be disappointed.
- Plan the dates. When a Chinese girl dates a Chinese guy, it’s always the guy who plans the dates and takes the initiative. That’s what Chinese women will expect from you, obviously—they love it when a man is confident and capable of planning.
- Look your best. Chinese women look gorgeous without exaggeration, and it’s not only about their natural beauty. It’s also about makeup, fashion sense, fitness, and a healthy lifestyle—these girls do their best to look great, so you need to look good, too.
- Learn about Chinese culture before you begin dating them. For example, touching or hugging on the first date may be considered rude, tapping your bowl with chopsticks is considered impolite, and beckoning someone with your index finger means that you despise that person. These are only three etiquette rules, and in a culture that rich, there are probably hundreds of them. Learn about the etiquette and culture of this country in advance in order to not screw up.
- Show respect when meeting her parents. Your Chinese girl will probably want you to meet them quite soon—you’ll have to be respectful, show confidence, and show that you’re a responsible man who can provide for the family. Financial security is very important in this regard.
These are just the basic rules, but to successfully date a Chinese woman, you will have to learn a lot of new things—you should take it as a new and exciting experience.
Our editors’ conclusion
“The Chinese relationship culture is complex and difficult to understand for a foreigner from a Western culture. However, you don’t need to be scared of it. Chinese girls are very open-minded and interesting to talk to, they speak English and are aware of the Western culture, especially if we’re talking about educated, young Chinese women you can meet on dating sites. Many Chinese women are genuinely interested in finding a boyfriend or a husband from the US. The language barrier and cultural differences will be a challenge, but it’s not a challenge that can’t be solved if you love each other and want to be together.”